1. |
Tell Me Why I'm Okay
03:17
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There’s nothing like a healthy dose of reality
From the words on my computer and the cable tv
Everyone gets lucky so I guess I should chill
But if everybody’s dead there’s no one left to kill
You crawl across the kitchen eat your food on the floor
You cover up the window and you lock up the door
You’re terrified of nothing as you weep through the day
Masturbate to memories ‘til you’re not afraid
There’s a piece of me breaking inside everyday
It can’t wait it can’t wait to get out
Cuz if the storm ahead’s looking for someone to take
I can’t wait I can’t wait to get out
You spit out all the medicine they told you to take
There’s nothing that can fix you if there is then it’s fake
She says your spasms are genetic the depression will heal
Well I don’t need no one to tell me how I should feel
You told your family that you should have stayed in the closet
Well you tried to get back in I had the key but I lost it
You’re freaking out you calm down and you freak out again
And when you’re hanging from the ceiling nothing else can be said
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2. |
CRUTCH
02:44
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This is my crutch this is my dream
This is the only thing that ever helps me sleep
This is my home this is my head
This is my heart on drugs the monster in my bed
This is my crutch!
These are my aches this is my pain
This is a giant fabrication of what makes someone insane
This is a joke this is so sad
And I never knew that feeling good could make you feel so bad
This is a lie I should have told you all before
I don’t know what I’m saying what I’ve said and I can’t say it anymore
I’ve been a mess I’ve been a dick
I’ve been on medication I can’t pronounce and I’m fucking sick of it
I feel so incomplete I think that I’ve been beat I’ve never felt so weak
Christ give me something quick my emotions make me sick is this something I can fix
This is my crutch this is my dream
This is the only time I feel like I’ve been beat
This is my pill this is my end
This is the only thing I need and I’m so lucky you’re my friend
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3. |
Broken Brain
03:13
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I’ll be alright staying with you
It’ll take some time to save me
You’ll kill the pain with all that you do
My broken brain baby
I had a problem I didn’t like it now I know exactly who I am
You try to talk you try to change you finally learn to understand
I need the buzz I hate the taste can’t let this Xanax go to waste
I’ll give it up five bucks for two is that enough to get you through
I never thought that I was weak ‘til I was too afraid to speak
I had a lump inside my chest I pulled it out I did my best
They tried to tell me love won’t heal but they don’t know how real love feels
They couldn’t see it they wasn’t there I had to look I had to care
I’ll be alright staying with you
It’ll take some time to save me
I made it through I’m still alive
Nothing’s gonna break me down I know I will survive
I got tired of saying that I’m fine
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4. |
Whatever
03:42
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I used to like FIDLAR that’s what she told me
As I got into my van to see the country
Now she’s got a new boyfriend or so I’m guessing
Probably kisses her way better and that’s depressing
Now I’m drinking in Philly but I’m thinking of Sara
And there’s a million little things she’s unaware of
I couldn’t tell if she saw me or if she’s even looking
But there’s no other place I’d rather be than Brooklyn
And I am so fucking sick of you acting like a dick
I’m just trying to pull my life back together
And I am too fucking tired of you calling me a liar
I’ll just tell you what I want I’ll say whatever
I’ll say whatever I’ll say whatever
I’ll say whatever I’ll say whatever
I was thinking about calling but I’m feeling lazy
Eight hundred miles in a car can drive you crazy
Ah we can say that it was worth it for a minute it was perfect
But I’m tired of this hurting I need to work shit out
And I’m still messed up from when you said you didn’t love me
Thirty minutes before we played ten songs about your name
And they started screaming back as I had a heart attack
As I tried to play the lead as I yelled you’re all I need
I freaked out when I saw her there I didn’t know what to do
Looked at me like I meant something I never saw that in you
I let you go cuz I loved you more than I ever wanted to
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5. |
Over It
03:12
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I don’t need to say what I said before
You never listen to me anyways my voice is sore
I’m not sick at all I’m just sick of you
And now you’re coming back but I don’t fucking miss you
I never thought that you would be the one to break
Now everytime I see your name I get a stomach ache
I know I did my best I never sent a text
And now I’m sitting wishing aren’t you fucking dead yet
You seem to think that we’re more than this
Aren’t you over it aren’t you over it
Don’t try to act like you gave a shit
Aren’t you over it aren’t you over it
We used to be something I admit
Aren’t you over it aren’t you over it
I used to think we were over this
Aren’t you over it aren’t you over it
You open up again I’m closing every door
Cuz once you called it off I never said I wanted more
It’s hard to be this way when you know everything
And you’re still hurting me for reasons that I can’t explain
I need to figure out a way to let it go
It’s not okay to be afraid of someone I don’t know
And I could give it up but that would make me think
Bout how I’m freaking out every time my phone rings
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6. |
Me and We and I
04:50
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I shaved my head the other day I was scared that I was losing my hair its a mess
It hit the ground I can still hear the sound of the clippers on the back of my neck
I took a shower stood for an hour in the front of the mirror what a freak
I put my clothes on a hint of cologne and brushed the last bit of hair off my cheek
I don’t need to be so scared of what everybody will say
As long as I got me and we and I it’ll be okay
I can’t sit anymore I’ll be up in your face I’ll get up in your grill I’ll be all over the place
As long as I got me and we and I It’ll be okay
I closed the circle of the friends that I had they only made me feel bad and alone
It felt so wrong and I knew all along that I could make it alright but I won’t
I used to skate now it’s something I hate I get so hot I get so sweaty and I can’t break my bones
There’s too much riding on the van that I’m driving to the kids that talk shit at the shows
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7. |
Goodbyes
03:14
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Thought I’d given it up I guess I missed one
Shot me straight in the chest where did she come from
I was losing my head before she found me
Painting dreams in my bed it’s all around me
Morning knocked me awake and ripped my clothes off
Give you all I can give I’m such a show off
Think that I’m just afraid to lose my baby
But look at all of the light that she just gave me
Don’t you get it I’m pathetic it’s not easy to hide
You’re fucking perfect why’s it hurting when I look in your eyes
Never knew it I could do it after all of this time
Wanna love and kiss and hug you I’m afraid of goodbyes
In the light of the day I close my window
Lose myself in the shade where did the sun go
Drink till I’m not afraid I’m feeling lazy
Won’t you put me to sleep I’m fucking crazy
I know I should forget it
If it’s dying I should let it
Ah it’s just pathetic
I think I’m doing alright I think I made it
And once you’ve found the one man you can taste it
You’re the wreck of a ship she is your sailor
So after all of this time you sink together
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8. |
Pills
02:49
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There’s a sad sad story in everyone but something always gives it away
Is it the drugs you take or the mess you made or is it hard just waking up everyday
Now I’ve been scared before but it’s hard to breath you’re the only one keeping me sane
Have you had too much are you going to leave can anybody make it okay
Cuz I know (I know) Oh I know (I know)
I’m a lot to handle I’m a lot to handle
And I swear (I swear) oh I swear (I swear)
That I’ll do whatever
Call me crazy call me self prescribed
But I will carry these pills ‘til the day I die
I won’t lose you I might lose my mind
But I will carry these pills ‘til the day I die
I got an endless wave of anxiety and I think it gets worse at night
And the hypochondriac in me is screaming that you’re gonna die
I never hurt myself but this hurts like hell getting better but its taking it’s time
And out of all the people I lost before I never thought of losing my mind
No I never thought of losing my mind
Don’t know why I can not breathe my insides feel outside of me
I know it’s weird I’m such a creep I take a pill I fall asleep
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9. |
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It’s so strange but I guess I’m coming home again
Nothing’s changed and I’ll never be alone again
It’s insane how I never felt like I was gone
I get down and I turn the television on
I count the road signs I don’t wanna pass
Then I start drinking and I act like an ass
I need some space won’t you leave me alone
I guess there’s no place like not being home
I guess there’s no place like not being home
I guess there’s no place like
I feel fine as I sit in Minneapolis
That’s a lie she’s crying how are you okay with this
I stand outside ‘til my face starts to freeze
I drink another ‘til she’s all that I see
I feel sick as I’m driving into Illinois
Is this it am I gonna die I’m paranoid
I need the back row that’s all I have
I blow my nose into a Taco Bell bag
Then I start drinking and I act like an ass
I count the road signs I don’t wanna pass
I need some space won’t you leave me alone
I guess there’s no place like not being home
I guess there’s no place like not being home
I guess there’s no place like not being home
I guess there’s no place like not being home
I guess there’s no place like
I’m like a corpse as I walk through the door
I leave my bags and my shit on the floor
Ten thousand miles couldn’t take you from me
I close my eyes and I’m finally asleep
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10. |
Hold Me Down
04:15
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I tried every plan I told every lie it’s not you it’s me I don’t wanna fight
I’m tired of making out and never making up
I’ve heard a thousand words spit off a thousand tongues you gotta make mistakes
and twenty two is so young
I’d rather fall back down before I grow back up
There’s not love in life but there’s a lot in you wish i could cut you up
and take a piece of it too
I’m never great with words but I think this song is for you
You answer all my calls you hold me down when I shake
carry every pill that I could ever take
I never felt so dumb I never felt so cool
Can I take all of your time if that’s scary then it’s fine
But I’d like to take the day just to memorize your face
There’s a couple different ways to explain the things I say
But as far as I can see you’re my favorite part of me
I’ve lost a thousand friends and I’d do it all again if
It means I’m here beside you forget the ones I’ve lied to
Fuck everyone
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11. |
Alone
03:34
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Boy did I screw up again
Talk about losing a friend
I never try more than I should
Now she’s leaving and I wish I could
She’s a real pretty girl that I know
A real pretty girl that I know
Thought that I’d scare her away
A mistake that I shouldn’t have made
Wearing my blood on my sleeve
Smothering helps but it’s harder to breathe
Thought that I was whole again
But baby I’m alone again
Never thought I’d see the end but baby I’m alone
Drunk and cold and lost again
Baby I’m alone again
Never thought I’d lose the friend
Well Kaylee I’m alone
I sat on your bed in your freezing apartment
my boxes were left on the floor where our shoes went
You tried to explain it was me that was missing the point
you had made but I still wasn’t listening
I’d noticed a gift you had bought me last year
so I walked to your desk picked it up and I hear
It’s not mine anymore it had always been yours like
the heart that you tore from my guts with your words
So you led me downstairs as we got to my car afraid and ashamed I forgot where I parked
So I turned to your face and we had our last kiss it wasn’t the same I can still taste the spit
As I looked in your eyes can’t believe what I heard you had started to speak and these were the words
You said
Please please don’t change the words to this
Please please don’t change the words to this
Please please don’t change the words to this
Please please don’t change the words to this
Song
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